[::..Banana Republic Of The Holy Ghosts..::]
I’m aware – and flattered – that I’m gossiped about. Gossip is telling “made up” or partial truths about someone else, to further one’s own purpose. I suppose people who engage in conjecture, assumption and mind reading with the intent of entertaining themselves; have their own higher purpose. Perception is everything in gossips, therefore whether the subjects leveled against any particular individuals are true or not, those who thirst at the opportunity for a place in a network and in the union of the ‘holy ghosts’, will always take the side of the story that favors their own line of thinking. In a ‘I scratch your back, you scratch my back’ world, any form of alliance is an opportunity. As long as each has a place in the universe where they are their own brightest sun, they don’t have to be friends, relatives or sisters. Usually, they can just push their way through with people. They are all in the same league; a pushy, contemptuous and egotistical women with an exaggerated sense of dignityIt’s all just human stuff. I can’t help it when people often mistake those who are confident about their capability or who are relaxed about looking good as being loud, proud or an attention seeker. On the contrary, it’s always the self-conscious, weak, insecure egotistical monkeys that personalize and focus mainly on themselves.
I am not challenging morality, provoking dissent and disrespect, or encouraging over indulgence. All I’ve been trying to say was – “if you can’t co-exist among us for the greater good of all, how the FUCK is that my problem?”
I know for a fact that it upsets certain species of monkeys that I’m candid. Throughout human history, you see that the worst problems for people almost always come from other people, and it’s the same for monkeys. You can put them anywhere in the world – USA, Afghanistan, Iraq, Westport, Longhill, Teluk Saga or Planet Of the Apes for that matter, but when small monkeys try to project big image, one can’t help but to observe their typical intense devotion or an overzealous ambition to become KING KONG. Among them, we will notice there is always that same old frantic ambition to pull, minute by minute, every available string with a patronizing superiority to prove their worth, only to draw the attention of crowds who in the end mattered least.
When we accept ourselves, we’ve nothing to prove. There’s no need to conform, compete or claim for superiority. Self-confident people express themselves clearly and live to experience life fully. Ziehan and I have happily given up our prohibitions because being authentic is important to us. This is what operating from abundance actually means. Tapped into a force greater than ourselves, we work for the benefit of all. What we do goes beyond seeking personal glorification.
Today however, I woke up feeling the need to spin something noteworthy for the good of all to judge, to bring to the surface and lay bare for all and sundry to feast their eyes on, to be the one instead with that frantic ambition to pull, minute by minute, every available string with a patronizing attitude to prove my worth. After all, I did promise a certain individual a cost free advertisement in my space – REMEMBER?
For a start, let’s discuss those ‘damned fucking pigs shisha friends’ that you were so incensed at. Through these ‘pigs’, you planted the seed of doubt by accusing others of playing a prominent role in your burning household. Now, if these ‘pigs’ became ‘pigs’ for a reason only you knew best, my question is – how different a ‘PIG’ are you for your prominent role in a family crisis that’s never yours to be involved in?
Now that you have my attention, please do not flatter yourself. Your attempt to project yourself as the leading light of your Klaz generation is but a hollow boast. You think of yourself as a genuine article, a monumental figure, in the mould of a charismatic woman. But the self-seeking publicity that you constantly sought in Klaz made it patently obvious that you have a ‘genetic character disorder’ with an oversize ego that looks at others in a very narrow form. Much too often, you question the probity of many good people around you with a hope to leave them blemish.
In one of your vitriolic outburst against those ‘damned fucking pigs shisha friends’, I remember you wrote “Ishh..ishh..ishh!! korang semua ada maen peranan lah babe!” - This is just one fine example of your ‘genetic character disorder.’ You should have sought counsel with some of the ‘holy ghosts’ from your ‘Banana Republic’ whose monologue more often was like a press conference that extolled your group’s efforts to create a morally upright and virtuous Republic. As sure as I am now that you are no different a ‘PIG’ than those that you cursed and swore, lest you forget – “ENGKAU PUN ADA MAIN PERANAN LA BEB!!!”
All Work and No Play Will Make Jazz A Dull Boy - 12:50:00 AM